Controversial...

Pretty sure I'm gonna get a lot of hate mail for this, but guys, you know me by now. You should know what to expect. 

Selfies to raise awareness of cancer research...right. It seems to me that everyone in the world with Facebook and Twitter and access to the internet in general is aware of cancer. They know the pain and heartache it causes, the immense strength that people can show in order to fight this disease. Almost everyone has been affected by cancer in some way. Personally, it's one of my most loved family members. He has terminal cancer and faces it every day with a strength, determination and sense of humour that I admire deeply. 

But people also know about cancer research. They know that people all around the world are working together tirelessly to end the suffering cancer causes. And I really don't think that a selfie of me will make any difference in the world. It won't make anyone more aware of cancer, nor the research being done. So instead I want to share a photo of a man who has inspired me. A man who makes me laugh with his blog posts, who regularly boosts my self-esteem with his love and kindness, a man with family and friends who will never stop loving him or thinking of him no matter what the future brings. And what is more fitting to raise cancer research awareness than a photo which includes the beautiful wife he will leave behind? Watching the man you love get sick, and feeling helpless and unable to change the inevitable is a completely different type of torture, and her courage deserves recognition too. I may be wrong, but I feel this photo is worth a thousand selfies of my ugly mug. 

If it ain't broke...

I don't like change. I get set in my ways very easily and unnecessary change upsets me. I will never understand why websites and apps and shops go to such an effort to constantly keep changing the way they operate. 

Take Facebook for example. It used to be a perfectly simple website, with easily navigated walls and news feeds. But that wasn't good enough for the buggers. Now we've got TIMELINES. With posts and pictures all over the bloody place, making it headache central if you're trying to find some specific info. 

Another example is Snapchat, a delightful app allowing you to send pictures to friends for free. The previous layout was simple and instinctive to use. Now it's just a bloody mess! 

I'm such a cantankerous old mare, but surely someone out there can agree with the moral of this story: if it ain't broke, don't fix it. 'Cause "fixing" it will just piss me right the fuck off. 

Long time no See

It's been rather a long time since my last post. I'd like to blame this on a busy social life, however the real culprit is actually my pathetically short attention span. I envy goldfish. 

My return to these pages can be blamed upon my most favourite darling uncle, Unky T. A touching appeal on his own blog has pushed me to again pour my meagre thoughts out to the world at large. I am, sadly, a little too busy today for an extended recount of the last year, so I shall leave you now with a promise to return very soon with the whole epic tale. 

My last words today will answer a question which has no doubt plagued you all...

I found the pillow. 

Finders Keepers, Losers Weepers...

Karma's a bitch. She stole my pillow. Apparently karma is catching up with me for the things I've found over the years and claimed as my own: My sister's eyeshadow My sister's sweeties My sister's books My sister's CDs... (Let's just cut a long story short and say "my sister's stuff".) Back to karma. She has obviously decided enough is enough and I must be taught a lesson. It is now my turn to be the weeping loser. My pillow has disappeared. I'm a fussy sleeper; a sensitive uvula and my ability to snore through nuclear wars mean that I can only comfortably sleep on my tummy. I'm sure there are other face-down sleepers out there who understand the importance of the perfect pillow combination to achieve sleep in this position - the delicate balance of high enough to breathe but low enough to avoid neck pain is so easily broken by pillow adjustment. I had my own arranged perfectly, conducive to a quick drop off. But tonight I am horrified to discover that my pillowcase contains only one sliver of pillow, instead of its usual two. So where is my pillow? No one else in the house has seen or touched it (or rather, admitted to seeing or touching it) and I have hunted literally both high and low for the little rascal. And still no sign. Did karma sneak in and steal it last night as I tried and failed to find comfort on a friend's couch? Or is the culprit less conceptual and more corporeal..? At least I have something to ponder as I look toward the dark sleepless night ahead of me. Perhaps I could take the time to design some flyers begging for the safe return of my much beloved pillow...

All Work And No Play...

...makes me such a grumpy mare.

I started this Beauty Therapy course assuming that I would need a basic knowledge of the human body. I did not, however, anticipate that the course would be more detailed and more intensive than that of first year nursing. When I do eventually finish this paper on the reproductive system I have another due a day later on ALL the body systems, and how the massage strokes we use affect each part. To be around 35 pages long. Fun, right?

It doesn't help that my brain seems to have melted out of my ears, and all the while I'm meant to be practising my practical skills not only in massage but also manicures, facials, facial massage, aaaand keeping up to date with my regular homework on different types of skin and hair and which products to use on each, and how the skin is structured and how many layers the epidermis has and whether or not the sebaceous layer includes nerve endings or blood vessels.

Argh.

4 days of college a week and a day at work at a job I hate... isn't life peachy? And aren't I getting desperate with my procrastination?

Leave The Past in the Past...

Sometimes there are things that you know are wrong. Unfortunately there us this magical creature named vodka, which tends to impair decision making abilities. Is it really so wrong to revisit the past? Should some things jusb left alonez? Should mobiles be allowedwhen alcohol is involved? Come back tonme tomorrow for answers....

The Second Catastrophe...

Me. 3 friends. 3 litres of vodka. It's gonna be messy.